relationship with God

Depression

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I learned today that Pastor Rick Warren’s son Matthew committed suicide. At times like this there is a lot of discussion concerning mental illness. In the main, I find that most of the talk is healthy, in that we talk about different kinds of mental illness and how to help friends and family who find themselves in its often deadly grip. It may seem obvious, but it bears repeating that no family is immune. No matter how comfortable financially, no matter how together spiritually someone may seem, disorders of the mind are equal opportunity foes. Even these days, when we would like to consider ourselves more enlightened, it’s not easy to talk about. People struggle for years with depression without telling anyone, fearing the social stigma attached.

Although I gave my life to Christ when I was 12, by the time I reached college age, my relationship with God had started to slip. Personally, the problems I had later on were magnified by the fact that I didn’t take these issues to God. For that matter, I didn’t seek professional help either. Instead, my wife was left with the awful chore of trying to support me emotionally. She saw me through some terrible times, but I will always regret that she had to suffer such pain trying to help. There are many levels of depression. I suffered for years with feelings of inadequacy and crippling fear that sometimes made it hard to leave the house. I forced myself to work, but was often held back by this unnamed fear. Please understand that I don’t claim to have an easy answer for the multifaceted issue that depression is, but for myself the abandonment of my faith caused me to be so much more vulnerable. I am thankful to God that I made it through the worst of my own pain. I hope in some way by the grace of God to be able to help others who are going through it too.

Two years ago my older brother, Jay, who had suffered with his own mental pain and substance abuse took his life in the same way Matthew Warren did. The resulting pain our family endured was compounded by the fact that he did it shortly before my Mother died as a result of cancer. It’s a time that almost seems unreal now. I understand what the Warren family is going through and I’m praying for them as they grieve the loss of Matthew. I know one of the things they will do is something we all should seek to do as well, try to find ways to help others. We aren’t always aware of the positive impact we can have on those around us. This is a good time to reach out.

Right Relationship

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There was a time in my life when the first place I would visit in any bookstore was the “Self Help” section. Later, when I worked in bookstores, I would joke with customers and tell them that I could show them where self help was, but after that they were on their own. Sorry ma’am, it’s self help, your first step towards wellness is finding the books by yourself. Of course, I’m kidding, but I think that if I ever said that, it would have been to someone who knew me and my sense of humor very well. Knowing what kind of relationship you have with people is important. You can let your hair down with friends and family and know you’ll be understood. But while it’s essential to have close healthy relationships with the people in our lives who matter most, the one we should be closest to often gets the leftovers. “God, when I have time I’ll sit down and it will be just you and me; I promise.” But our actions speak louder than anything we ever say.

So what kind of relationship are you cultivating with God? The bible says the church is the Bride of Christ.

Let us rejoice and exult and give him the glory, for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and his Bride has made herself ready; it was granted her to clothe herself with fine linen, bright and pure”— for the fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints. And the angel said to me, “Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the marriage supper of the Lamb.” And he said to me, “These are the true words of God.”
Revelation 19:7-9

Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.
Ephesians 5:25-27

If we want that close and open relationship with Jesus, and want to know everything about Him, where do we start? The Word is the best place to go.
The grass withers, the flower fades, but the word of our God stands forever.
Isaiah 40:8
We can trust that He wants the best for us and has great plans for our lives if we will submit and trust Him.
“For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.”
Jeremiah 29:11

So how would you characterize your relationship with the Lord? Do you spend quality time getting to know each other or do you just occasionally throw Him a “like” on Facebook? Don’t get me wrong, I’m writing this for myself as much as for you. I do think it’s a good question to ask ourselves, though. Good relationships take effort.

Like Sheep

All of us like sheep have gone astray,
each of us has turned to his own way;
But the Lord has caused the iniquity
of us all to fall on Him. Isaiah 53:6

Sheep have been unfairly “branded” with the stupid label. The primary reason for this lies in their flocking behavior which causes sheep to group together and play follow the leader, at times to tragic results. Since nature hasn’t equipped them with great individual defensive abilities, their best bet is to join together in a group. We also tend to value the individual over the group, but a sheep on its own is vulnerable to being preyed upon.

The verse refers to the passion of the Servant, our savior Jesus Christ, who suffered vicariously for our sins. His punishment obtained well being for us.

While we are all vulnerable on our own to temptation and being misled, this does not absolve us of our responsibility for becoming informed through scripture and prayer so that we might better defend ourselves against the onslaught of the enemy. At the same time, the body of Christ must join together to pool resources and search the word for edification and reproof.

You See Me

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You see me
anything false floats away
ash
impermanent as when it was
smoke

You’ve gently
drawn me in
to begin
discarding yesterday’s
clothes

In my dreams
I stop
running
away
anyhow

Your Word
woos me
to here…to You
to
now

Relinquishment of Control

Will your car start tomorrow morning when it’s time for you to go to work? Will a freak storm level most of the town you live in? Will your future wife walk into your office, look into your eyes, and see something that she can’t really describe, but which irrevocably changes both of your lives? I sometimes play that game in my mind, where I go back in time, but this time I’m armed with the knowledge of what has already happened. But what if you went back and changed one thing? What if you decided to get your car fixed before that day it wouldn’t start? What if that change in timing meant you turned your head at the wrong time at the office and that magic moment never happened? Going back in time doesn’t seem like such a great idea now, does it?

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It’s easy to see how our meddling with time could mess up our future. We aren’t meant to have that kind of power. But what would change in your future if you gave control to God? What if you actually became so sensitive to God’s voice that He didn’t have to keep hitting you over the head to get your attention? You might say, “That would be great, nothing bad would ever happen to me, because I would always be in God’s perfect will!” Wrong! Even when we do our best to listen to God, stuff happens. A lot of those happenings are things we don’t like. But God knows what we need, long term or short term. His plan is always best, even if we don’t understand. For I know the plans that I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11

Father, let me know you so well that I trust you to read the map.
I won’t constantly stop the car and complain that we are going the
wrong way. When you say, “Turn here,” I won’t ask you if you’re
sure, I’ll just turn the wheel. Let a peace wash over me that tells
me I will get to just the right place at just the right time to have
the future you’ve designed for your servant.

Circumstance

Circumstances, the events or conditions in our lives that we experience, don’t have an inherent value besides what we assign to them. A flat tire, while certainly a negative experience, is still just an event. Most of us have probably heard the saying, “attitude is everything.” Again, it’s not a difficult concept to embrace, but I think as we encounter various circumstances during the course of a typical day, we forget that we are in the business of assigning power, minute by minute, to our experiences.

As Christians, our prayers may include asking God to keep our families safe, to provide for us financially, to give us our favorite parking spot at the supermarket. Do we worship a living God who knows us intimately, who we trust to provide for us through all that we encounter? Or do we make of our God a servant who is responsible for fulfilling our every whim? Of course we serve a loving God who wants every good thing for His children, but our relationship will be stymied if we choose to rely on a temporal view instead of God’s eternal view. Only one of those two attitudes can cause us to survive and thrive through a voyage that may bring us fair or contrary winds.

When to Worship

Honestly, the book of Habakkuk was not on my radar. It’s a small book near the end of the Old Testament, written by a prophet we don’t know much about. A theme in much of the Old Testament is man’s relationship with God. In a nutshell, man has always had a habit of forgetting God when things are going well and complaining when the situation worsens. The reigning king at the time of Habakkuk, Jehoiakim, was described by the prophet Jeremiah in this way: “your eyes and your heart are intent only upon your own dishonest gain, and on shedding innocent blood and on practicing oppression and extortion” Jer. 22:17 It was against this backdrop, during a time of increasing evil in Judah and oppression by the Babylonians, that Habakkuk writes of praise in chapter 3. I quote chapter 3:17-19 here: “Though the fig tree should not blossom and there be no fruit on the vines, though the yield of the olive should fail and the fields produce no food, though the flock should be cut off from the fold and there be no cattle in the stalls, yet I will exult in the Lord, I will rejoice in the God of my salvation. The Lord God is my strength, and He has made my feet like hinds feet, and makes me walk on my high places.”

It’s easy to praise God when the sailing is smooth and complain when we are buffeted by storms. The self discipline required to stop for a moment to consider how we might grow and learn during those times is neither automatic nor easy to come by. However, God is always worthy of our praise and deference, and although we may not always be able to understand His ways, He remains on the throne. Of that we can be certain.

God, please accept my worship.
Let my song be lifted high.
When I focus on what’s difficult in my life,
help me remember the times
you’ve renewed my strength and joy,
carried me when I couldn’t walk.
When my foundation felt unstable
You were always my solid rock.
Increase my understanding,
in the darkness let it be my light.
Give me the same breath to sing in the valley
that I breathe when I sing on the heights.