Month: February 2013

My Dad and Merv

When I was a kid, I watched a lot of television. After school, especially on days when the weather was not especially inviting, I would sit down and tune in to one of the three channels available. Since the public television station didn’t come in as well, that meant we really had two choices. One of the talk/variety shows airing at that time of day was the Merv Griffin Show. Merv’s was one of the first of this style of shows, and he became quite successful with it and the game shows he produced, like Wheel of Fortune. I believe his style of interviewing was one of the reasons he did so well. He had this way of leaning toward the person he was talking to and looking at them as if they were the most fascinating person in the world. It was almost, but not quite, as if he was a scientist peering through a microscope, discovering a previously unknown species. He was probably able to get more out of the celebrities he conversed with than he otherwise might have. Later, during my journalism training, I think this helped me when I interviewed people for various stories.

Also, when I was growing up, our family owned a service station in our small town. My grandfather owed the business, my grandmother worked in the office, and my dad managed it. As a boy, I spent a lot of time cleaning up and seeing how my dad worked with his customers. Like Merv, he was also a good listener. Often, the customers who came in weren’t very knowledgeable about their automobiles. Like many of us, they simply knew when they weren’t working or when they were doing something out of the ordinary, like making an unusual noise. At this point Dad would become a detective. He got as much information as possible and gradually narrowed down the list of possible causes and remedies for the various issues until he had a direction to go toward solving their problem. He seemed to enjoy this part of his work. People trusted him to take care of their issues. There were many aspects of his job that I know were frustrating, but I think this part made made his job more rewarding. I think watching him work made serving people later on in life more enjoyable for me as well. It also helped me listen for important details.

When I speak with you,
I hope I
pause
often
during our conversation.
I hope
if only for a
moment
to make what you say and think the
world.
It may be the only time today that anyone does that
and there is always a chance
when we will part,
we will each be the richer.

Forever Means More

Whenever I worship you, God
I forget about what’s wrong with me
and remember what’s right with you.
I set aside my worries and cares
and I’m thankful for the storms,
because forever means more.

I’m familiar with the war.
I’ve been through some of that before.
Yes, I carry the scars.
It’s a battle that started
in Eden long ago.

Forever in ways is similar to the world we think we know,
but side by side it’s more vibrant and distinct.
It’s like the difference
between behind the curtain
and the very front of the stage…
where the crowd roars,
forever is more.

Everything else fades away
when I think about how much
you mean to me
and the forever home
you’ve readied for your own.
All those things
that seem grand here
are just a portion, Lord
’cause forever means more.

When it’s time for us to rest,
and we’ve learned to give up striving
and passed the test,
I’ll be so grateful for the struggle
and for what you have in store.
I know
forever means more.

When to Worship

Honestly, the book of Habakkuk was not on my radar. It’s a small book near the end of the Old Testament, written by a prophet we don’t know much about. A theme in much of the Old Testament is man’s relationship with God. In a nutshell, man has always had a habit of forgetting God when things are going well and complaining when the situation worsens. The reigning king at the time of Habakkuk, Jehoiakim, was described by the prophet Jeremiah in this way: “your eyes and your heart are intent only upon your own dishonest gain, and on shedding innocent blood and on practicing oppression and extortion” Jer. 22:17 It was against this backdrop, during a time of increasing evil in Judah and oppression by the Babylonians, that Habakkuk writes of praise in chapter 3. I quote chapter 3:17-19 here: “Though the fig tree should not blossom and there be no fruit on the vines, though the yield of the olive should fail and the fields produce no food, though the flock should be cut off from the fold and there be no cattle in the stalls, yet I will exult in the Lord, I will rejoice in the God of my salvation. The Lord God is my strength, and He has made my feet like hinds feet, and makes me walk on my high places.”

It’s easy to praise God when the sailing is smooth and complain when we are buffeted by storms. The self discipline required to stop for a moment to consider how we might grow and learn during those times is neither automatic nor easy to come by. However, God is always worthy of our praise and deference, and although we may not always be able to understand His ways, He remains on the throne. Of that we can be certain.

God, please accept my worship.
Let my song be lifted high.
When I focus on what’s difficult in my life,
help me remember the times
you’ve renewed my strength and joy,
carried me when I couldn’t walk.
When my foundation felt unstable
You were always my solid rock.
Increase my understanding,
in the darkness let it be my light.
Give me the same breath to sing in the valley
that I breathe when I sing on the heights.

God’s First Bandmember

First, a couple notes:
1) Friends who are drummers, don’t get a big head over this.
2) I won’t pretend there is any biblical basis for my poem. I am not adding or subtracting from what is between the covers. I’m just sayin’.

Do you think something was left out?
Maybe it was just inferred.
Perhaps when God wrote Genesis,
He assumed we’d understand that in his word,
in the background sometimes subtle,
sometimes quiet,
sometimes loud,
is the presence of a great drummer,
who, thank God, is not proud.
Although he or she could certainly be,
because when God first considered man
and everything else in creation
and (come on, of course!) the first band,
for His first band member, He found a drummer
who could put Buddy Rich to shame.
If you’re too young, or not into big bands
you’ll have to Google his name.
For proof I offer my heart,
or yours,
or a friend’s.
I imagine at the end of the first day
there was a drum solo no one wanted to end.
So the next time you hear music
of, I suppose, any kind,
imagine God’s first band
without a drummer to keep time.

Valentine

I’ve sort of lost track. I think I can be forgiven for not being sure exactly how many, but Lori and I have been through at least 34 Valentine’s days together. Wow! That means if I had a nickel for every time I wished I had given her more for Valentine’s Day I would have (time out for complex calculation) $1.70, give or take a nickel. But how do you put a price on being in love with your best friend for that many years. The answer of course is that you can’t. By the same token, how do you put it into words? Over time it’s only gotten harder. That doesn’t mean I won’t give it a shot, so here’s my valentine, Lori Ann.

V is for Value. As I said previously, a relationship that is stronger than all the stuff two people together for this long inevitably go through is truly something you can’t put a price on. In the end, if you don’t have any possessions and your bank account is down to zero balance, the relationships you have are of more value than your net worth at your most wealthy state.

A is for Attraction. The reasons for being attracted to my wife have grown more numerous over the years. I’ve frightened myself in the mirror enough times first thing in the morning to hope she feels the same way. In the beginning of a relationship it’s easy to find the energy to do the extra things to maintain attraction for your special someone. It may take more imagination over time but should never feel like work.

L is for Levitate. Have you ever flown in your dreams? I’ve got to say, it feels so real. When I wake up it seems for a moment as though I could simply hop up and take off, but no, darn gravity. But even when the reality of the stuff we all go through in the real world threatens to hold us down, it can be so wonderful to have someone to give you a boost.

E is for Extra. My Mom once told me that she and Dad had this bedtime ritual, whoever got to the bathroom first before bed put the toothpaste on the other’s toothbrush. You walk into the bathroom to brush your teeth and that’s one less chore you have to do. So, we’ve done that for as long as I can remember. That’s a little thing. It’s an extra thing. It’s just one of the countless things you do for someone you care for to make their day a little better.

N is for Next. I read somewhere that love wasn’t gazing into each other’s eyes but looking forward in the same direction together. That’s part of the excitement of growing and planning together. Sometimes it’s just the excitement of finding out what’s around the next bend at the same time.

T is for Touch. Just in general I don’t think people touch enough. We have so many ways to interact that don’t actually involve being within the physical proximity of another human being that we lose that familiarity, that comfort, of sharing our love and friendship with each other. Sometimes the things couples do when they are first dating, like holding hands, sort of fall by the wayside. Remembering to touch each other can be cheap relationship insurance. Also, it’s hard to be angry with someone you are giving intentional affection with a gentle touch.

I is for inspire. Inspiration doesn’t always come from earth shattering actions. Sometimes inspirational people do their magic in lots of small ways. Over the course of a lifetime you might suddenly realize the person you are most inspired by is the person who managed to say just the right thing or give you just the right amount of encouragement when you most needed it. If that person just happens to be your valentine then you are truly blessed.

N #2 is for New. Finding ways to keep your affection for each other fresh is not always easy but the desire to keep love new is half the battle. If I have a good sense of humor, Lori is largely responsible. Not only is she funny, she makes me think I am.

E #2 is for Entranced. When I think of being entranced I think of the kind of entrancement the best magicians utilize. You’re not sure just how they do what they do; you just know you are amazed at the outcome. I’m happy to still be under my wife’s spell and look forward to another lifetime of magic.
Happy Valentine’s Day, Lori Ann.

Dear hands,

Dear hands,
Be open.
Hold on
to life
until the time is right to
let it go.
Point
the way to the cross
where the
nails
drove through His wrists.
Fight
for what is right.
Gently lead
the directionless.
Comfort
the hurting.
Bring home
the lost.

Big Risk

There’s Big Risk
lurking
just around the corner.
Do you dare get out of your chair?
He’s a monster of epic proportions
waiting for you there.
You imagine…
He’s checking off names in an old leather notebook
with a pencil worn down to the nub.
Surely he’s fried bigger fish than you,
You’re just the latest to join the club.
You can hear him breathing
out and in
heavy and slow.
Your heart feels
as though it might burst
if you get up and go.

Then you remember your dreams,
the goals, the plans.
A flame flickers
to life
inside you.
The fire gets bigger
than the fear living there.
It rushes from room to room.

Now ablaze with courage,
you stand up and step out
around the corner to face it.
It’s time to live or die trying,
You’re so mad at that monster,
you could spit.

Sweat pouring from your forehead,
you look,
ready to do battle with Goliath.
Forward,
nothing there.
To the sides,
naught there too.
Then you look down
and catch your breath.

Instead of the demon you imagined,
ready to eat you for lunch,
There’s a cute little monster
with a bullhorn twice his size.
Clearly, he couldn’t do much.

Then you see
you mistook
where the battlefield lay;
it wasn’t with the titan you thought.
It was with yourself
and wanna be monsters
that you truly fought.

Matthew 10:26-31
26 “So do not be afraid of them, for there is nothing concealed that will not be disclosed, or hidden that will not be made known. 27 What I tell you in the dark, speak in the daylight; what is whispered in your ear, proclaim from the roofs. 28 Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell. 29 Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground outside your Father’s care. 30 And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. 31 So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.

Unique

All are unique, though each of us
under the sun
are all part of the same.

Your own blend of talents
and foibles
and genius of art,
together with your name…

bring a certain indefinable
flavor to our world;
a particular purpose and goal.

Without you,
your special piece
in God’s puzzle,
the image
would be something less
than whole.

penfrea's avatarpenfrea. com Nehemiah's Art

The first time I remember that art was a special part of my life  was when I was a preschooler in my home church.  Maybe that’s why faith and art for me are intricately linked.  I loved my home church in Long Beach where I grew up.  My dad, a marvelous craftsman, had made the cross in the sanctuary and he made all the cribs in the infant’s room.  In my memory there were quite a few cribs so we must have had a lot of young families.  I remember looking in that nursery with the little choo choo train on the wall that said PVACC (for Palo Verde Avenue Christian Church).  Because of this particular early memory I am quite sure that I must have been very young and in one of those cribs as I viewed that wall.

It was in this little room that I sat, cross legged on…

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